Laugh Conquers All

So with three internet dating sites on the go, everything's going a bit mad. Possibly bad and dangerous to know as well. I'm having a bit of trouble keeping up, but I think I'm still on top of things, just.  And anyway - after this sudden peak, I am fairly sure all will suddenly disappear and there will be nothing left, within days.  But at the moment things are quite exciting!

The other night a chap of 41 who lived locally, and was so utterly drop dead gorgeous that he gave me butterflies, contacted me.  I got back to him, and he turned out to be Sheikh from Leicestershire who had used a picture of a male model instead of himself, and completed an entirely fictitious profile, including describing himself as 'white/Caucasion'.  Well what is the point of that? But I felt a bit spooked.

A day later an equally delicious young man of 34, Italian this time, contacted me, and looking at the pictures, he really is from Plymouth. But - now what? He's not brilliant at English and I can't imagine what we would talk about, or how he would make me laugh.  I think he must be some kind of gigolo, but that is my suspicious mind.

Several of them write so utterly beautifully that you think they must speak like that too.  And then they don't. Quite a lot of them look defeated and sad, even though everybody bangs on about how happy they are in their profiles.  They're all also after honesty apparently.  I bet if honesty really hit them in the face they'd run a mile.  All the beaches that allow dogs must be packed out by lonely hearts enjoying what they love best.  'I'm just a normal guy' doesn't do much to sell anyone to someone like me.  'who enjoys the good things in life like eating out, going to the cinema and theatre, as well as cosy nights in by the fire' drone on the cliche-packed profiles.

So far everybody I've come across on the internet seems to have some kind of major drawback. Usually they are too old (I thought 60 should be my top limit - that's pretty old), too small, too fat, too bald, too glass half empty, or too boring.  Annoyingly, I am also becoming increasingly convinced that it will only work for me with a private school person. Not that I'm particularly snobbish, but because ours is a little world of its own, where everybody has an automatic understanding of each other. So that cuts out a mere 95% of the human race.  

What does unite everybody that I have met is that they all, bar one or two, appear to be extremely nice, decent, well-intentioned people.  Just like anyone that you might meet on the street really.  Which they are, if you think about it!

And my guess is that if the really made me smile, giggle and laugh with uncontrollable mirth, any other concerns might well go straight out of the window.

So if it's inevitable that you must be flawed in some way if you're internet dating, what's my problem, you may well ask.  Well it's obvious isn't it?  I am surrounded by sheep.